masseffectlastnight:

(954): It’s only 4pm and I’m already way past my preferred quota of “could have died” moments.

Screenshot source.

laughingstation:

More FUNNY POST here!

the-absolute-funniest-posts:

vanjalen:

Murkin mothafuckas on the b-ball court

laugh-addict:

Me:

masseffectlastnight:

(917): It’s not Facebook stalking, it’s market research.

Screenshot source.  

masseffectlastnight:

(903): He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding. 
(541):Can I have him when you’re done?

Submitted by anonymous.
Screenshot source.  

injectability:

thatbesskid:

“You want to know what happiness is? It’s waking up in the middle of the night for no reason, shifting under the blankets and feeling the heat of the person next to you. You turn around and see them in their most peaceful, innocent, and vulnerable state. They breathe as though the weight of the world lays on anyone’s shoulder but their own. You smile, kiss their face in the most gentle manner so as not to wake them. You turn back around and an involuntary grin forms on your own face. You feel an arm wrap around your waist, and you know it doesn’t get any better than this.